Unfortunate Person #2: The Taxi Driver
Right, so the taxi driver showed up at our gate and I was ready and waiting. Unfortunately, the taxi booker lady didn't tell him he would actually need to drive into our gate (normally, they just reverse up to the gate so they can drive straight out without having to go through our centre), so he was in a bad mood to start off with because he had to turn the car around again. Then we showed up with my mountain of boxes to put in the boot (aka the trunk) of his car and again, he was not happy. Oh, well - he's getting paid, so why shouldn't he relax? Well, then I apparently "slammed" the door. This angered him and he yelled at me. Yep, we were not off to a good start - we hadn't even started up the taxi yet. Then, we stopped at the post office on the way and we also apparently took entirely too long. For our information, we were informed that we had been in there a whole quarter of an hour, and he would have to charge us extra for that. The length of our stay at the post office was not intentional (see later in this post) and I did feel bad about it, but I didn't appreciate the way he dealt with the situation. On the way to the restaurant, he also yelled at another driver because that driver didn't yield the right of way to him. Oh, dear. I was happy to get out of the cab. The conversation Tom and I were having quickly died when the taxi driver yelled at the other driver. It was replaced by awkward silence.
Unfortunate Person #3: The Post Office Lady
While we were sitting in the taxi, we saw that the Royal Mail truck was just about to pull away, essentially meaning we had just missed the mail for that day (Unfortunate Event #2) (I should point out that this was not a full time post office, but one that is operated out of a store). Anyway, so in I walk with my 3 boxes and I say that I would like to post these. Well, the lady looks a little flustered and says I just missed the truck for the day. I answered that I know and I even gave a little laugh and add that it was just my luck really. Then she says, "But that means they won't be able to go out until Monday." I explained to her that this was fine as I was in no hurry to send those boxes. She then said, "But that means we'll have to keep these boxes until Monday! I don't know where we'll put them." This was followed by an awkward silence at which point she finally said, "Well, I guess we'll find somewhere for them to go." At this point Tom walked in with the other three boxes. She was not a happy camper.
She then proceeded to be the slowest postal worker in history. She complained about the weight of the boxes and said that she would have to get someone else to lift them. None of my boxes weighed over 5kgs. Her co-worker stood there and watched the entire thing happen, not once offering to help out to speed matters up. Well, that's not entirely true - at one point she offered to move the weighed boxes off the counter and onto the floor. Yep, totally helpful. Thank you.
At this point, I pretty much decided that Weymouth had absolutely nothing left to offer me.
Unfortunate Person #4: The Lucky Train Man
I eventually got onto a train to London, after missing, not only my original train, but also the one that was sitting on the platform when I bought my ticket by about 30 seconds (Unfortunate Event #3). I was sitting on my own, minding my own business when a man and a woman got on the train at one of the many stops on the way to London. He seemed extremely excited by this train and said, "Oh, this is a lucky train! A lucky, lucky train!" He walked a bit more and then repeated, "Oh, this is a lucky train! A lucky, lucky train!" and this continued for a bit, until he finally sat down and stopped saying how lucky the train was.
I never did get to find out why the train was so damn lucky.
Unfortunate Person #5: The Toilet (aka bathroom) Lady
Once again, I am sitting there on the train, minding my own business, when all of a sudden I hear incredibly loud banging coming from the back of the car near the toilet. Then I hear a lady yelling at the top of her voice:
"Boys! BOYS! Help! I am locked in the toilet!"
Now these two boys being the ever helpful fine young gentlemen that they were didn't even bother to get up or even move their mobiles away from their ears. One of them eventually grunted, "Press the OPEN button."
There was a loud whoshing noise as the toiled door slid open. Then, the toilet lady was free once again. It was beautiful - it practically made me cry.
Kidding!
Unfortunate Person #6: The Duck Feeder Lady
Ok. It's now day two and I am in London. FINALLY. I decide to go and relax and eat breakfast in Hyde Park and watch the birds. This old lady - you know the type - comes down to the water and proceeds to throw great big chunks of bread to the geese. You know the size I mean - think about the Dead Duck Day scene in About a Boy. If you haven't seen this film, rent it - it's brilliant.
But, I digress....
Eventually the lady comes over and sits beside me on my bench. She has two dogs with her - one is able to walk properly and follows her over, the second is a dog named Oscar and he is obviously having trouble walking. I feel really bad for him because he is clearly trying to make it over to her but his legs just aren't working right. He really looks like he is in pain. Another elderly lady was walking on the path at the same time and noticed Oscar. She asks the duck feeding lady if this dog belongs to her.
Duck Feeding Lady: Yes, that is my dog.
Elderly Lady: What's wrong with it's legs? Or is it just old?
Duck Feeding Lady (dismissively): Well, you wouldn't walk to well either if you were a 17 year old dog!
Elderly Lady: Yes, well . . . I didn't mean to - [Writer's note: I think she was going to say bother you, but this is just speculating]
Duck Feeding Lady (incredibly rudely): Well, DON'T then!!!!
And, then the conversation ended swiftly.
THE END.
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